men

My dogs are asking to be beaten....They ate my lunch, that I forgot to grab on the way out; to work. They also pulled all of my clothes out of my room, and onto the floor of my living room. Life...ah how I hate you. 

Today's story will be about my birth father. Richard, my father, was put into jail when I was an infant. I only met him once, when I was two. I wrote to him every week until I was eleven. when I turned 11, I wanted to know why he was in jail. The story that he beat up a man did not hold up anymore. He was in prison too long. So, I asked my grandmother. She told me to write him a letter asking, and if he didn't tell me, she would. Then, I thought it was fair. Today, I think that she should have lied, and not told me the truth.

When I received the letter from him, I read how he raped women because his mother treated him like a girl; so he hated women. He blamed her completely. I hated him. I hated men. I stopped talking to him. I did not feel comfortable being around men alone. (Well, it's that and my grandfather; but that's another story). 

Apparently, he would drive his taxi around, pick up hookers, and force them to perform oral sex on him, among other things. He would hold a knife to their throats, and talk trash to them. He did it to at least 3 women.

A couple years ago, I decided to forgive him. I needed to move forward in my life, and I thought this was a good way to go. So...I wrote him. We've been writing letters since. It's extremely odd how much we have in common. Our handwriting is even very similar. 

-Wolf

Started good, ending bad...

Well, the whole let's hope the rest of the day is good, blew up in my face. Excellent. . . The dogs destroyed one of my couch cushions....I have to sew it back together.....exciting. . . .

I've decided that I needed some luck, and I figured you might need some too. So here's a spell for luck.

You need:
Green Candle
Black Candle
White Candle
Orange Candle
Purple Candle

First, you should wash yourself with soap that has avocado in it (Avocado promotes wealth and luck). In a quiet room, call your circle. Take your athame, and carve the rune symbol for luck into a green candle.

Light the black candle and say: 
"This is my bad luck. Leave me now, you're not welcome here anymore. I shed no tears over the parting." 

Light the white one and say: 
"This one neutralizes any remnants of bad luck. They dissolve into nothingness now." 

Light the orange one and say: 
"This one represents the changes for good which are coming into my life. I welcome them with open arms." 

Light the purple candle and say: 
"This is the astral energy that I need to speed up the change." 


Finally, light the green candle, while chanting: 
"I welcome change. I welcome the incoming good into my life." 


You must leave the candle to burn completely.




So my grandmother told me a story today about when my mother was younger. It was a nice story, which is different from the ones in my mother's past. 


My grandmother had just moved into a shitty apartment with my mom and aunt liz, after the divorce from Frank. It was a week before Christmas, and my grandmother didn't have any money for presents, or anything else for that matter. However, my mother found that there were people selling trees for only $5 down the street, so she begged my grandmother to give her $5, to at least have a tree. My grandmother caved, and gave her the money, and my mother came back with the saddest looking tree. My grandmother looked at this Charlie Brown tree and said 'see, I told you that you couldn't get a good tree for $5, I'm going to bed."


Well, a few hours later, my mother and aunt woke up my grandmother, and brought her into the living room. The tree was full and decorated. My grandmother exclaimed 'It's a christmas miracle!' And my mother says 'no, we found another tree in the trash, and we took off the branches, and duct taped them to this tree; and only put the decorations on the branches attached to the tree.'


Creative, huh?


-Wolf

IWGs

Today has started out pretty good. At 303am, I won a playstation prize pack from an instant win game on mycokerewards.com. I also got 6 coupons for free halls ( from an instant win game), and free sleep water from walmart, in the mail yesterday. It helped me ignore the fact that I got screwed, and not in an omg omg, harder harder kinda way.

I have been thinking about doing a giveaway, to bring readers here....considering I have a total of....let's see....0 readers.

Let's see....what little story should I write about today? One about myself? Yeah, sure why not. This is a no holds bar with everyone else, so I might as well keep myself in it too.

Let's talk about my neighbors.

Last year, I bought a house. Unfortunately, when you are looking at houses, you don't really get to interact with the neighbors before you buy it. Also, you don't get to know they employment records of everyone on the block. This was shitty for me because most of my direct neighbors are housewives. And we all know housewives....gossip and drama. And that's exactly what I got.

My one neighbor, we'll call her Karen, came home with a, seemingly, full bred german shepherd. Her story about how she found the dog that night was that it was tied to a *brick* in a park late at night. And OBVIOUSLY the dog was being abused and was unwanted. So they took it home. Well, to begin with, I have a german shepherd, and she wouldn't just stay still tied to a brick and not move. Also, the dog looked healthy.

Well, a few days later, I was told by my boyfriend that the cops were called on Karen because they thought it was a police dog in training; and I, being the smart person that I am, assumed that it was the cop neighbor of mine. So, trying to be nice to the neighbors, and talk to them, I asked the neighbor (the house wife) on the other side of Karen, if the cop was the one who called the police.

I should have known better because, apparently, the house wife was better friends with Karen than I thought. She ran over to her telling Karen, and everyone else, that I was the one who called the cops and that I was blaming the cop neighbor. It was a sloppy mess. A lot of yelling on the house wife's part, screaming that she doesn't want to get involved. Yeah, cause what she did wasn't getting involved. Now all the neighbors hate me, and talk shit about me all the time.

They started saying shit like I am the cause of the clovers in their yard. Yeah, me. Not the lack of nitrogen in the soil....but me. They said other shit too. I actually had a neighbor from down the street come up to me on a monday afternoon, drunk as a skunk, screaming at me, saying I said shit about the neighbors on facebook. A. I  didn't say anything but that I needed help dealing with them. B. OMG you stalked me on facebook?

Oh, and by the way, they sold the dog....twice. Once to a person who gave it back, and let them keep the money, and again to another person. Ohhh.....and since then, they have been buying puppies and selling them for more money....yep....seriously....."buying" puppies....

-Wolf

tough day

Today was a terrible day. A girl at my work, who hasn't gone to school in 15 years, got an analyst job that I was trying to get. She is unqualified, but sucks political dick (not sure if it's figurative or literal). I am very upset about this because I have been working my ass off in school, and I deserve the job. I had to hide my angry and resentment all day. I've been having suicidal and homicidal ideations (thank the psychology degree for that word). It has been getting more and more difficult hiding my problems, and I can't afford my therapist right now. My grandmother once told me that, when she was younger, she tied a nylon around her neck and tied it 9 times; and said that if god wanted her to live, she would be able to untie all the knots.

Well, she's alive, so I guess she got all the knots untied....that or she punked out and cut the nylon. I wonder if that means the suicidal thoughts can be passed down genetically. . .

Anywho....Here's a lighter story from the ol' family memory bank.

When my great uncle was younger, my grandmother had the duty of watching him every now and then, and tell her mother if he was having a seizure (he was prone to them every now and then). One day, my grandmother walked passed Ricky's room, and saw my great-uncle behind the bed, shaking. She assumed that he was convulsing from a seizure, so she ran into her mother's room, and told her. Much to everyone's surprise, when they went into my uncle's room, it was found out that he was not having a seizure. He was actually masterbating. My great-grandmother had to explain that to my young grandmother.


On the note of masterbating....head on over to twitter and follow @edenfantasys...they have great deals, and  do giveaways.

-Wolf

To Start

The dogs are 'play fighting' right now. Sophie [the St. Bernard] is on  the ground, while Storm [ the german shepherd] goes after her. It would be cute, if it wasn't so loud. now it's just annoying and frustrating. I am trying to finish my homework....well actually start my homework. So I decided to start writing some of my story. 

My grandmother's mother was married to Richard Lawson. He was the founder of a newspaper in Northeast Philadelphia. When my grandmother was very young, he left his wife for his secretary. My great-grandmother was left with a daughter and a son with cerebal palsy. 

She married another man, whom my grandmother only refers to as 'the old man,' It should be 'the mean old man' because he would get drunk a lot, and it caused my great-grandmother to drink as well. While he was drunk, he would do mean things. An example of this is, once, he went out and bought my grandmother, great-uncle, and 'the old man's' two other children (whom he had with my great-grandmother), brand new clothes. All of them fancy and nice. This was surprising, since they did not get many nice things. So, the old man showed the kids the new clothes, getting them all excited. Then, he took them into a trashcan, and lit them on fire. Great guy, right? 

This wasn't the only mean thing the old man did. He also molested my great-uncle. I'm not sure how many times. They were taken away after that. There are more stories that go with that, but that's for later.

On a lighter note, since we are speaking about clothes, Here are a few discount offers:

40% off Ann Taylor online http://i56.tinypic.com/2u9jo21.png

-Wolf

Why

I decided to start a blog. I decide to start a lot of things that don't end up going anywhere. Let's hope this does better.

A while back I thought of writing a book about my family. However, things began to become complicated with the story. There was so many short stories to put into the book. So many different perspectives to put in place. So, that leads me to this. I figure that I will write some of the stories that I have been told from my family, and get people's input on what should be put in the book; and also so advice on how it can be put together.

I also figured I'd do other things on here as well, to bring people to read; such as giveaways.